Painful memories of unrequited love


goo Ranking recently looked at painful experiences people had when confessing their love to another.


Over the 25th and 26th of November 2011 1,074 members of the goo Research online monitor group completed a private internet-based questionnaire. 57.4% of the sample were female, 11.6% in their teens, 14.7% in their twenties, 26.9% in their thirties, 25.0% in their forties, 11.1% in their fifties, and 10.7% aged sixty or older. Note that the score in the results refers to the relative number of votes for each option, not a percentage of the total sample.

Note I’ve used “they”, “them”, and “their” rather than “he/she”, “him/her” and “his/her” to make the text more readable, I hope.

Ranking result

Q: What painful experiences have you had confessing your love? (Sample size=1,074)

Rank Score
1I was sure the feelings were mutual but my advance was snubbed100
2Before I could confess, a rumour spread that I fancied them97.8
3I thought they were free, but they were already in a relationship83.3
4When I went to declare my love, I was so vague I didn’t get my feelings across72.2
5Against my sober judgement, blurted out my love in a drunken fevour55.6
6The day after confessing my love everyone knew all about it51.1
7=I was nervous and just couldn’t get my words out correctly42.2
7=I was nervous and just couldn’t get any words out at all42.2
9They said they’d reply another day but never replied40.0
10I thought they were single, but they were already married25.6
11I confessed my love, but was embarrassed and ended with “By the way, it’s all lies!”22.2
12Someone else spotted me as I was declaring my love18.9
13When I called out to them, they gave me a dirty look so I couldn’t confess17.8
14I sent an “I love you!” email to the wrong person13.3
15I chose a love song at karaoke and stuck their name into it, but they missed it6.7
16=I came out in a fever so I couldn’t make it to the place I’d asked them to meet me at4.4
16=I sang a love song I wrote myself, but it put the willies up them4.4
18I was so nervous when confessing my love that my clothes were dripping with sweat2.2
19=I was seen practising my confession speech1.1
19=I phoned the wrong person but continued to declare my love for them1.1
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