Woohoo, another FAIL ranking! This time it’s a good one for not just the festive season, but also for tomorrow’s Coming of Age Day, which usually includes getting blootered with your old school mates after (or indeed, before) the ceremony. So, the subject is failures people have had when drunk, conducted by goo Ranking as usual.


Over the 25th and 26th of November 2011 1,074 members of the goo Research online monitor group completed a private internet-based questionnaire. 57.4% of the sample were female, 11.6% in their teens, 14.7% in their twenties, 26.9% in their thirties, 25.0% in their forties, 11.1% in their fifties, and 10.7% aged sixty or older. Note that the score in the results refers to the relative number of votes for each option, not a percentage of the total sample. Further note that the 125 people in their teens would not have been asked this question since they are below the drinking age of 20.

It’s a bit of a cliche, so I’ll skip a photo of number one, and instead find a different kind of crashed-out drunk:


I’ve never had the falling asleep in the train one, although when I first came to Japan in the evenings seemingly random trains decided not to stop at my stop, so it was all too common for me and other foreigner colleagues to end up quite a bit further down the line than we intended…

Looking at the list, I’ve only done four, honest!

Ranking result

Q: What failures have you had while drunk? (Sample size=949)

Rank   Score
1 Fell asleep on the train and ended up at the last stop 100
2 Threw up in the train, on the platform 97.7
3 Walked into a lamppost, wall on the way home 64.9
4 Went into the opposite sex toilets 63.4
5 Fell asleep in the pub 55.0
6 Spat out abuse to someone older than me 46.6
7 Stuffed my face at a late-night ramen shop 42.0
8= Fell asleep on the road home 41.2
8= Spent all my cash so had to bum drinks 41.2
10 Made a mistake changing trains and ended up in an unknown station 35.9
11 Fell asleep in the toilet at home 35.1
12 Forgot to lock the toilet door and someone walked in 32.8
13 Made a drunken and passionate phone call, email, etc to an ex 30.5
14 Compulsively phoned everyone late at night 25.2
15 Got lost going between pubs, on the way home 22.9
16 Drunkenly declared my love to someone I fancied 19.1
17= Got home in someone else’s shoes 14.5
17= Fell asleep in the nude at home 14.5
17= Lost my mobile phone 14.5
20 Lost my bag 13.7
21 Entered the wrong house 13.0
22 Spent the night in a field 11.5
23 Got home in someone else’s jacket 9.9
24 Joined in with the wrong group at the pub 9.2
25 Stepped in dog poo between pubs, going home 8.4
26 Flushed my mobile phone down the toilet 7.6
27 Brought the pub menu, ashtray, etc home 6.9
28 Deleted someone important’s mobile phonebook entry in a moment of drunken passion 6.1
29 Got home barefoot 3.8
30 Got home with someone else’s bag 1.5


Warren A · January 9, 2012 at 06:55

Where’s the “I woke up beside someone I don’t know” or “punched my best friend” responses? Those are REAL and valid polls. lol . . .

Good Dogs, Bad Cops, And Booze All Around [Sunday News] | Tofugu · January 16, 2012 at 04:17

[…] adults, and newly-minted adults drink themselves into a stupor. It’s no coincidence that a recent What Japan Thinks poll about embarrassing things Japanese people have done while drunk was posted on the same day as […]

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