世論 What Japan Thinks

Just a couple of days ago there was a report from Reuters on a forthcoming Daddy exam for Japanese fathers to hone their parenting skills on. Looking around the Japanese web I found many weird and wonderful exams and qualifications, or 検定, kentei as they are called in Japaneseso for your enjoyment and edification I present the top ten strangest qualificatons I came across!

10. Mount Fuji Master

As the Japanese proverb says, “He who climbs Mount Fuji once is a wise man, he who climbs it twice is a fool.” Perhaps there should be an extension to cover those who sit all three levels of the Mount Fuji Kentei? Whether or not any of the questions involve the vending machines at the top of the mountain is unknown.

9. Comic Certification

I suppose it is inevitable that there is a manga-based examination. This one by ebook Japan offers three levels of certification in the way of Japanese comics from beginner to master otaku. If the subject matter is too broad, they offer separate qualifications for specific comic book series from Princess Princess to Ge Ge Ge no Kitaro.

8. Dead Body Diploma

The Japan Stone Industry Association have got together to offer the aspiring graveyard caretaker the chance to show they know the best way to keep their plots from pushing up dasies. For a mere 30,000 yen you too can sit the test.

7. Kobe Knowledge

Many towns and other major tourist areas seem to have such a test, from Hokkaido to Okinawa, often sponsored by the local government. These qualifications do require a formal test with fees of just 1,500 yen for the Kobe one, but once it is obtained it may actually be useful if pursuing a tourism-related job in the area.

6. Order of the Octopus

Just down the road from Kobe is Akashi, famous for its tako, or octopus (which, by the way, are cruelly castrated to provide snack food for the residents of Osaka, just down another road from Kobe) so it seems only natural that there are people wishing to be experts on these sea creatures. Here you can demonstrate your knowledge of the multi-testicled beasts (hence the aforementioned takoyaki octopus balls) with questions such what is their favourite shellfish.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7G6KT-JGIwA

5. Timetable Test

The perfect qualification for trainspotters or insomniacs. Just memorise the contents of all railway, ferry and aeroplane timetables, and you’ll pass easily. Zzzz.

4. NAMAHAGE Professor Trial

I think the official English title is entertaining enough so I need not come up with an alliterative alternative. The Namahage is a traditional New Year festival from the the Oga Peninsula in the north of Japan, where the young men of the village dress up as fierce demons and invade houses, scaring all the children they can find, so presumably sitting the test will improve your chances of being a demon. Whether or not the exam rates the scariness or otherwise of the sitters is not documented.

3. Underpants University

Gunze, the maker of fine underpants and other garments for men’s nether regions presents a free and short shorts exam (currently being advertised at a railway stations I frequent) for you to sit and prove you know your thongs from your codpieces. A trial sitting of the test shows that I have mastered just 37% in the way of the boxers.

2. Idiot Initiation

Test how much of an idiot you are. This can be done either from a handy DAM Station karaoke machine (don’t ask why!) or from your mobile phone, for the rather high fee of 945 yen. Perhaps parting with all that cash is in itself some indication of how much of a fool you are? There is an introductory idiocy test available for free online.

1. Batchelor of Brassiere Science

What could be finer than a breast examination? Wacoal, a major manufacturer of ladies lingergie, celebrated bra day on the 12th of February by releasing a small but pert(inent) test of one’s knowledge of these garments. I took the test to see how well I keep abreast of this topic, but I gained a mere A-cup sized score.